Monday, April 03, 2006

Porn Again Christians ... or ... Ministers Should be Obscene and Not Heard

posted by The Vidiot @ 1:00 PM Permalink

What's the greatest danger to Americans?
It's pornography. And if you're a consumer, John Harmer thinks you're damaging your brain.
Of course he blows his credibility right away:
"It's the most profitable industry in the world," he said. "But I'm convinced we'll demonstrate in the not-too-distant future the actual physical harm that pornography causes and hold them financially accountable"
Gee, and here I thought dealing drugs and/or guns, getting no-bid cost-plus contracts, being an oil company executive or a Bush Pioneer were much more profitable ... and obscene. Nice to know Harmer (how ironic is that name?) doesn't have any facts to back up his allegations of damage.

And now the christian thought police speak up, or as I prefer to refer to them, the penis gallery:
"I compare it to your house burning down," said Laurie Hall, who divorced her husband after writing a book called "An Affair of the Mind," about his 20-year obsession with porn. [Ed: Hey, no wonder he preferred Rosy Palm, last time I saw a mouth like that it had a hook in it (/Dangerfield)]
[...]
Mark Laaser of Eden Prairie, Minn., says he frequently sought out pornography and engaged in extramarital sex for more than 20 years, starting in college and continuing through a career as pastor and counselor. [Ed: So at 40+ years of age his sex drive diminished. I'm sure it's all that self control he practices.]
[...]
Another self-described former addict is Phil Burress, head of a Cincinnati-based conservative group called Citizens for Community Values. [...] Burress is encouraged by the recent formation of an FBI anti-obscenity squad and the appointment of Brent Ward, a former U.S. attorney who combatted porn in Utah, to head an obscenity prosecution task force.
Because, God knows the FBI has nothing better to do than spend precious resources, not to mention precious bodily fluids, researching obscene materials and investigating people striving for momentary pleasure.

And now for the money shot:
"When I ask men who are sex addicts if they would want their wife or daughter to be in porn, 100 percent say, 'No,'"
In the first place, EEEwwwww! In the second place; I think most folks would prefer spanking the monkey , airing the orchid, polishing the dolphin, muffin buffin', rubbin' the nubbin, glad handing, rotating the drive head, worshipping wally the one-eyed wonder worm and finally, ta da! performing the Tibetan self-inflicted crotch nuzzle, rather than attempt coitus with sanctimonious, hyperboreal, gelid, bible thumping, holier than thou partners. To the above, I say GFY, and have a good time doing it.

This message was brought to you as a Pubic Service Announcement.

0 Comments:

Post a Comment

<< Home