One of Those "No Need for Clarification" Thangs When You Can Say it With a Song

posted by Bill Arnett @ 10:23 AM Permalink

Sometimes just the headline of a story can tell you everything you need to know without even reading the article. Here are some choices from the Huffington Post:

"Gonzales Given Week To Avoid Potential Perjury Probe" ["There's gonna be a showdown…" Electric Light Orchestra's It's Raining All Over the World]

"Republicans Expect 'Another Beating' In 2008" ["Oh, it's too late, baby, now it's too late…" Carole King's It's Too Late]

"Sex Lawsuit Could Complicate A Bloomberg Presidential Run" ["I'm too sexy for my cat too sexy for my cat…Poor pussy poor pussy cat…" Right Said Fred's I'm Too Sexy]

"Bancrofts Asked To Decide Today On Murdoch Bid" ["And what you say about his company…Is what you say about society.…Catch the mist, catch the myth…Catch the mystery, catch the drift.…" Rush's Tom Sawyer]

"Biden Blasts Rudy: "Tough Talk And Cheap Shots Won't Make America Any Safer" ["…But I shot a man in Reno…just to watch him die…" Johnny Cash's Folsom Prison Blues]

"Relationship Between Sumner, Shari Redstone "Shattered" "So don't go breaking my heart …I won't go breaking your heart…" Elton John's Don't Go Breaking My Heart]

"Bush On PM Brown: "I Kinda Had A Sense Of The Kind Of Person I Was Going To Be Dealing With” ["Don't talk don't talk don't talk don't talk…Baby don't talk…Body language…" Queen's Body Language]

"Bush Admin Subpoenas Michael Moore" ["I want you…I want you so bad…I want you…I want you so bad it's driving me mad…It's driving me mad…" The Beatles' I Want You (She's So Heavy)]

"Sen Specter Violates Informal Rule While Aboard Air Force One: Speaking With Reporters" ["Time can never mend…The careless whispers of a good friend …To the heart and mind…Ignorance is kind…There's no comfort in the truth…Pain is all you'll find…" Wham!'s Careless Whisper]

"Clinton Campaign Raises 'Cleavage' Cash" ["Hey, mister, have you got a dime?…Mister, do you want to spent some time? Oh, yeah…I got what you want, you got what I need…I'll be your baby, come and spend it on me…" Donna Summer's Bad Girl]

"White House Salaries Released: Rove, Senior Aides Get $2,800 Boost" ["Money, get back.…I'm all right Jack keep your hands off of my stack.…Money, it's a hit.…Don't give me that do goody good bullsh*t.…I'm in the high fidelity first-class travelling set…And I think I need a Lear jet…" Pink Floyd's Money]

"Gonzales Career Marked By 'Misstatements And Omissions' In Defense Of Bush Policies" ["Everybody's got something to hide except for me and my monkey…" The Beatles Everybody's Got Something to Hide Except for Me and My Monkey]

"Bancrofts Close To Accepting Murdoch Bid" ["I live my life like there's no tomorrow…All I've got I had to steal…At least I don't have to beg or borrow…Yes I'm living at a pace that kills…Oh, running with the devil…" Van Halen's Running with the Devil]

"Flings Between Reporters, Sources Not Uncommon" ["I got to have a shot of what you got is oh so sweet.…You got to make it hot, like a boomerang I need a repeat, Gimme all your lovin', all your hugs and kisses too, Gimme all your lovin', don't let up until we're through" ZZ Top's Gimme All Your Lovin']

"Growing GOP Movement Rejects Bush Iraq Plan" ["Hit young {bushie} in the eye…{bushie} didn't like that…He said I'm gonna get {those boys}" paraphrasing The Beatles' Rocky Raccoon]

Some days the headlines make it just too damned easy.

Labels: mainstream media, snark