Wednesday, July 01, 2009

And the loser of the, "I'll never give up; never surrender…"

posted by Bill Arnett @ 10:23 AM Permalink

…contest of willpower is (drum roll in the background) (wait for it!) STORMIN' NORMAN COLEMAN!!

Yes, Stormin' Norman Coleman has finally succumbed to the tenacious kryptonite-hurling attacks of Al Franken, an unearthly patient candidate who just kept wading through ever deeper excrement increasingly being hurled at himself and the Democratic Party since the '08 elections.

Ah, the people of Minnesota owe a great debt of gratitude to the republican party and Stormin' Norman, both of whom deprived the state of their lawfully elected Senator for the last seven months or so, ignoring the requirement that the state be represented by two Senators lawfully elected by a majority of Minnesotans, and damaging, perhaps permanently, democracy, by now forcing a candidate to not only win with a majority of votes, but whom must now be prepared with a phalanx of attorneys to continue the fight for victory and the assumption of office by the winning candidate if there remains time to be seated for that term.

I can't speak for anyone but myself, but other than the Bush/Gore illegal fiasco that gave us our first court-appointed president, I have never seen such a prime example of arrogance, whining, and overall general cowardice than that exhibited by Stormin' Norman. I expect to hear on the news any day now that Stormin' Norman, and his band of merry employees that know they may not be able to find any other jobs after this, have seized the in-state offices of Senator Franken, chained themselves to any desk, chair, or radiator they can find while threatening to conduct a coup against Minnesota leadership, from the governor down and to include the Senator himself.

It will be a difficult, arduous battle for them as they will be armed only with staplers, pencils and pens, paper airplanes, rubber bands shooting paperclips, and a promise to stay until the last mutineer has died of starvation or old age.

Anywho, see this:
After nearly eight months of waiting, almost 20,000 pages of legal briefs, and millions of dollars in election costs, Al Franken emerged Tuesday as the next United States senator from Minnesota, ending one of the most protracted election recount battles in recent memory.

Mr. Franken, 58, a former comedian and author, could be seated in the Senate as early as Monday, leaders there said, providing Democrats with something they had long hoped for: 60 votes, and thus at least the symbolic ability to overcome filibusters.

Norm Coleman, a Republican who had held the seat for a term, conceded on Tuesday afternoon, hours after the Minnesota Supreme Court issued a ruling in Mr. Franken’s favor, the latest in a series of findings that had left Mr. Franken ahead in the count. In weeks past, some Republican leaders had urged Mr. Coleman to press on to the federal courts if need be, but those calls faded Tuesday.
Wanna bet that 'those calls [that] faded Tuesday' were from what's left of the anemic leadership of that shipwrecked-on-a-desert-isle party, the gop, who begged and pleaded with Stormin' Norman to just give it up and stop embarrassing himself, the party, the state of Minnesota, the Senate in general, democratic elections, and the judges who continued to deny Stormin' Norman his fiefdom.

And congratulations to Senator Al Franken, now ready to accept the title, duties, and seat in the Senate he duly won.

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At 2:20 PM, Blogger The Vidiot said...

galaxy quest!

At 8:05 PM, Blogger libhom said...

If Wellstone hadn't been assassinated by the GOP, Coleman never would have become a Senator.

At 9:50 AM, Blogger The Vidiot said...

and neither would have franken.

At 10:32 AM, Blogger Bill Arnett said...

I just love it when the right man wins and losers like Stormin' Norman get their testicles served to them on a silver platter.

At 5:40 PM, Blogger The Sailor said...

Franken is probably one of the smartest and most informed policy wonks serving in the current senate.

And I hope/think it's harder to marginalize a senator than a president, (cough, Jimmy Carter, cough.)

I just hope he doesn't read/succumb to too much Village Press when he's inside the beltway.

p.s. I never thought he was that funny, but I think he'll make a good senator.


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