Wednesday, October 29, 2008

After watching Obama's half-hour informercial…

posted by Bill Arnett @ 10:44 PM Permalink

…I have arrived at the conclusion that Mr. Obama is the greatest natural statesman in America, on a par with Bill Clinton, the last total rock star politician America has had in my lifetime.

He is cogent, smart, and knowledgeable of what needs to be done to plug the leaking holes that are fast sinking America and destroying our way of life.

Listening to him made me feel proud to be an American again, a feeling that I had lost under the misguided stewardship of a corrupt, law-breaking, war and fear-mongering, war criminal and wanna be petty dictator, gw bush. I look at bush and all I can see and hear from him are the myriad ways in which he has denigrated this country, robbed us of our pride and standing in the world, and his continuing efforts to hogtie the hands of the next president by making some of the worst deals in American history with other politicians every bit as crooked and corrupt as is he.

I truly believe Barack Obama is the only candidate in this race that can begin the arduous process of restoring American pride, reestablishing world trust and respect for America in the world, and whom will keep the promises he has made about energy independence, keeping jobs in America, and, most importantly, providing educational opportunities for all and not just the wealthy.

Obama all the way for me, because I truly believe he will represent ALL Americans and not just the rich, but If McCain, against all odds, wins this election, then it will be time to take the advice of Aerosmith:
Well I woke up this morning
On the wrong side of the bed
And how I got to thinkin'
About all those things you said
About ordinary people
And how they make you sick
And if callin' names kicks back on you
Then I hope this does the trick

'Cause I'm a sick of your complainin'
About how many bills
And I'm sick of all your bitchin'
Bout your poodles and your pills
And I just can't see no humour
About your way of life
And I think I can do more for you
With this here fork and knife

Eat the Rich: there's only one thing they're good for
Eat the Rich: take one bite now - come back for more
Eat the Rich: I gotta get this off my chest
Eat the Rich: take one bite now, spit out the rest

So I called up my head shrinker
And I told him what I'd done
Said you'd best go on a diet
Yeah I hope you have some fun
And a don't go burst a bubble
On the rich folks who get rude
'Cause you won't get in no trouble
When you eats that kinda food
Now their smokin' up the junk bonds
And then they go get stiff
And they're dancin' in the yacht club
With Muff and Uncle Biff
But there's one good thing that happens
When you toss your pearls to swine
Their attitudes may taste like shit
But go real good with wine

Wake up kid, it's half past your youth
Ain't nothin' really changes but the date
You a grand slammer, but you no Babe Ruth
You gotta learn how to relate
Or you'll be swingin' from the pearly gate
Now you got all the answers, low and behold
You got the right key baby but the wrong key ho, yo

Believe in all the good things
That money just can't buy
Then you won't get no belly ache
From eatin' humble pie
I believe in rags to riches
Your inheritence won't last
So take your Grey Poupon my friend
And shove it up your ass!

Eat the Rich: there's only one thing they're good for
Eat the Rich: take one bite now - come back for more
Eat the Rich: don't stop me now I'm goin' crazy
Eat the Rich: that's my idea of a good time baby
Which does beg one last question:
Is it progress if a cannibal uses knife and fork?

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At 5:42 PM, Blogger The Vidiot said...

For my mom, the 'infomercial was a 4-tissue event.

At 9:19 PM, Blogger Bill Arnett said...

Hooray! I got pretty misty-eyed myself.

(And tell your mom I just got a new MacBook laptop and I hope she's enjoying hers as much as I am enjoying this one! I'm surprised by how much larger the 13" screen seems compared to the old 12" Ibook I used for years. And blaaaazzzziiinnng speed!)

At 9:35 PM, Blogger The Sailor said...

I thought it was over the top ... but then I'm not anyone's intended audience.

IRT MacTops, after my last personal one broke my lab bought me a $3.5k XPS PC laptop. Thats $2.5k more than I ever spent on a Mac.

I hate the damn thing, but it's hard to argue with free. I spent the $$ I would have spent on a new/rebuilt MacBook in the donation box of my local soup kitchen. They feed anyone who can get in the door, and have a van to deliver to folks who can't.

They fed me when I was hungry and poor. Now that I'm making money I thought that was where my money should go.

Tho I sure do miss my Mac;-)

At 9:44 PM, Blogger The Sailor said...

p.s. Am I the only one who heard Hughes Corporation's "Don't Rock the Boat Baby" in my head when reading "Eat the Rich: there's only one thing they're good for" !?

Maybe it's just A Modest Proposal.

At 1:12 PM, Blogger Bill Arnett said...

Maybe I'm just sick up and fed (courtesy of Cheech and Chong) with the fact that America is no longer a great innovator, a land of inventors, an industrial giant, and has become a service nation with most jobs being created in government or the service industries, which I think are the same thing with different titles.

As to computer, Back in 1986 i asked my boss for a new typewriter so my paperwork submitted to the courts would look professional. He told me instead to use the extra PC running MS-DOS and I literally told him, "F*** you! Why should I have to learn a new language to type a bail motion?" So he told me that they did also have a Lisa computer with the Max XL update I could use and I immediately fell in love with Macs. I keep telling my son that then I had one megabyte of RAM and and a five megabyte hard drive and that I was a "power user, damn it!" He still laughs his butt off every time I reminisce about it.


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