Friday, October 05, 2007

New type of Weapon of Mass Destruction Discovered. Are We Truly Safe?

posted by Bill Arnett @ 11:03 AM Permalink

A hitherto unknown type of WMD has been discovered which poses a particularly dangerous threat to courthouses everywhere in America. It was discovered by highly trained security experts at a courthouse in Coeur d'Alene, and the country owes these heroes a hugh debt for their personal awareness, training, bravery, and a thirst for justice being meted out to all who would threaten our court system.

From the article at
A Bonners Ferry woman says she was humiliated when security guards at the federal courthouse in Coeur d'Alene told her she'd have to remove her underwire bra to get inside.

Lori Plato said she was going into the courthouse for a court hearing Sept. 20 when the metal detector went off as she passed through security.

"When I walked through, the gentleman said, "'Do you have an underwire bra on?'." Plato said. "I said, 'Yeah.' He said, 'You have to remove it.' "

But there was nowhere private to remove her bra, she said. The guards suggested she go out to her car to do it.

Instead, Plato — who describes herself as "not petite" — said she removed her bra while her husband tried to shield her from view of others in the crowded lobby by holding up his coat.

She said she had to put the bra on a conveyor belt and send it through an x-ray machine.[…]

The U.S. Marshal's Service, which supervises security at the courthouse, said Plato was given options and chose not to exercise them. She was told she could have gone to her car or to a neighboring business to remove the bra, U.S. Marshal Patrick McDonald said.

"She's inflating it," McDonald said.

He said Plato turned her back on the security officers, who thought she was simply going to talk to her husband.

"All of a sudden she just took it off," McDonald said. "It wasn't anything we wanted to happen and it wasn't anything we asked for her to do. She did it so fast."[…]

"We never run into a problem where we thought anything like that was a weapon or looked like a weapon," he said.

McDonald declined to discuss other ways the federal courthouse guards could have screened Plato. "I don't want to get into security matters," he said.
The very thought of women wearing underwire bras into our courthouses positively terrifies me, as there is apparently no easy way to tell just what's wired underneath in that bra.

So kudos to the U.S. Marshal's Service for their keen powers of observation, dedication to duty, and for having identified this new threat.

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At 11:43 PM, Blogger The Sailor said...

Hey Bill, I wuz there and I saw them bazookas, sure looked like weapons of mass distraction to me ... what ... ohh ... destruction!?

Never mind.

At 9:12 AM, Blogger Bill Arnett said...

Bazookas, huh? Damn, and I thought they were gunboats. Oh, well, not everything snaps together.


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