TARGET: Good, Responsible Customers Whom Have Never Paid Late, Gone Over Limit, Paid Less Than Double the Min. Amt. Due, Never Done…
posted by Bill Arnett @ 12:50 AM Permalink
…anything but be a responsible consumer assiduously safeguarding his good credit standing.
I refer to a well-known department store, which shall remain nameless. For expediency's sake I'll use their initials: TARGET, TARGET, TARGET, TARGET, TARGET, TARGET, TARGET, TARGET, TARGET, TARGET, TARGET, TARGET, TARGET, TARGET, TARGET, TARGET, TARGET, TARGET, TARGET, TARGET, TARGET, TARGET, TARGET, TARGET, TARGET, TARGET, TARGET, TARGET, TARGET.
My beloved and responsible college student son, Jesse, applied for and received one of Target's Red Cards, a paper credit card lookalike, and, after paying the exorbitant price everyone was charging for LCD big screens in '06, he paid in full within three or four months.
He then, without further solicitation on his part was given a TARGET VISA, TARGET VISA, TARGET VISA, TARGET VISA, TARGET VISA with a much higher limit, which he used to buy various game and computer hardware (sorry for the highly technical jargon here) "hookin' up stuff," as well as a 46" Sony Bravia for ole Pops here. ALL,of course, paid off earlier than TARGET VISA thought they would be.
Again, and still, he continued making far above minimum payment well before the due date when he received in the mail a couple of weeks ago a notice that his credit limit was being reduced by a grand because a check of the "credit bureaus" revealed he owned no real estate, something which TARGET, TARGET, TARGET had been apprised of when the initial card had been applied for.
Yesterday comes a notice titled "REDcard Account Notice" telling him:
"The following is a summary of changes that are being made to the terms of your TARGET VISA CREDIT CARD ACCOUNT AGREEMENT [caps added Bill] You have the right to opt out of these changes.…
As of the first day of your billing cycle that begins in January 2010, the changes…described below will apply to all existing balances…and to any new transactions…
APR for Purchases 23.24%- This APR
APR for Cash Advances [of which Jesse has NEVER availed himself. Bill] 27.24%- This APR will vary with the market based on the Prime Rate.[…they continue…]
Opting out of these charges
If you don't wish to accept these charges [you broke down pukes whom we plan to hit with usurious interest charges despite our constitution speaking directly to, and forbidding, usury…editorial license will be freely taken unless TARGET or VISA choose to opt out in the next 30 seconds, of making us pay usurious interest rates your bought and paid for congress and senate allow you to charge despite the clear language of the Constitution. Bill], you may opt out by contacting us at the address or telephone number provided. If you opt out, your account will be closed and you vill…uh… will continue to make payments on any existing balance under the current terms [or ve vill enslave your children, beat your wives, rape your pets -or the other vay around, who can stop us? The citizens? HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA,HA, HA, HAHA, HA, HAHA, HA, HAHA, HA, HA…WHEW! Zat broughten ze tears to mine eyes! I kill myself with being all powerful UND so phucking phunny, too!…] The deadline to opt out is the last [day of your pitiful life! O-o-o-0 I krack myself up!] day of your billing period ending in January […so you phucking idiots can go on your last Christmas spree BWAHAHAHAHA!] Please see the message on your enclosed billing statement for the opt-out deadline.
It took Jesse about five minutes of intense thought while on walkabout through our living room so he could grab the phone and immediately cancel his card.
The usury trainee was shocked, especially when Jesse told her to look back on his account history for even ONE late payment, overcharge, payment less than well over, mostly two or three times, the amount due, and challenged her forcefully to name a single flaw in how he has handled his affairs with great care and attention to detail.
She could not, of course, so she made a generous offer to leave Jesse's card at the usurious interest he had already been paying.
THIS is why our economy is in the toilet. Good people get phucked over while multi-multi-billionaires who believe themselves gods above mere mortals, and that have PROVEN DRAMATICALLY they cannot handle their affairs without dragging down hundreds of thousands, if not millions or billions of good people, getting all the tax dollars paid by my wife and millions of our citizens struggling to live every month on a sum of money less than that paid for a manicure by one of those fargin' arsholes (as a 100% disabled vet my money in tax-free-I paid my taxes by almost dying for having served America while the fat cats got the endless deferments of the supreme cowards they are).
But that's just my opinion. I could be wrong [in ten trillion years].
Labels: bailouts, consumerism, credit cards, rant
Wow! Thank goodness I tuned in MSNBC and found out…
posted by Bill Arnett @ 9:40 AM Permalink
…that there are top, I mean TOP people commenting upon and striving to resolve America's financial and unemployment problems.
Astute, educated, knowledgeable men such as Mr. Stephen A. Smith, former journalist and ESPN reporter, a man therefore whom has a demonstrated ability at running a country of 300 million people and obviously capable of solving our unemployment difficulties single-handedly. Or not, as, after all, the bio box did say he was a
former journalist and ESPN reporter.
Why does America tolerate garbage like this and depend on these people to inform and educate them?
I don't know Mr. Smith, and 'though these comments may seem to be directed at him personally they are not. I am simply using him as a real life example of how newsreaders pretend to inform us with pretend celebrities. For all I know Mr. Smith is an M.I.T. graduate who then decided to major in economics on a full-ride scholarship from Harvard after obtaining his PhD in business marketing and financial modeling from Yale, but if so I think the bio box would have commented on that instead of 'former journalist and ESPN employee.'
And I'm certain Mr. Smith is at least as qualified to offer an opinion on these urgent matters as am I.
Wake up America, you're dreaming! (h/t to Cheech and Chong)
Labels: bailouts, Banking, banks, Blackwater, Economy, fear mongering, Fiscal irresponsibility, journalism, snark, Taliban
I just dropped in to see what condition my condition was in…
posted by Bill Arnett @ 10:34 AM Permalink
…[h/t to
Reef]
Is it just me or have bush/cheney, king and queen aspirants, seemingly completely, entirely, and perhaps forever utterly discredited democracy, destroyed any faith people used to have in election results, so damaging the very ideals expressed in the U.S. Constitution that they have become meaningless.?
Look what's been happening in Minnesota ever since good ole boy Norm Coleman (R-Jerkoff) lost the '08 election to Al Franken but has yet to acknowledge defeat, despite being told by the courts there at least twice that he lost. He is willfully depriving the constituency of that state one of its two U.S. Senators. Is that democracy?
Think back to:
Illegal phone, internet, and mail invasions of every American without a court order.
Illegal spying on groups of American citizens guilty of no wrongdoing whatever and the compiling of dossiers on those groups.
Think about the Pentagon using some of its very most powerful spy satellites, not on foreign countries causing international concern, but instead using them to spy on American citizens.
Think for a moment of the fact that you no longer enjoy the right to travel freely using any means of public transportation if your name appears on some arbitrarily composed 'terrorist watch list' of millions of names, composed by unknown people using unknown criteria.
How 'bout all those acknowledged FBI abuses of 'National Security Letters' to obtain information unlawfully and without judicial review?
Know now that the government wants to regulate your travel to Canada for goodness sakes, a country that from jump street has been an ally to America. Now you need a passport to travel to the best neighbor and friend a country could have.
Think how abused has been the 'State Secrets Act' to deny persons or companies from pursuing a case just by the mere assertion of the act without any showing that states secrets would actually be revealed if the case proceeded?
The GOP, republicans, allegedly devout defenders of America and the Rule of Law are now using every means within their power to obstruct the Senate, to stop the implementation of ideas and legislation by the Democratic party at all costs, even though they might agree that the ideas or legislature are sound? Obstructing just to obstruct, damaging the American legislative process, denying their constituents effective stewards of their wants and needs, even if it means betraying America as well. They will, have, and will continue to deliberately obstruct and betray America as the cowards, loudmouths, blowhards, idiots, and traitors they have become as a political party.
But lest you think this diatribe is strictly anti-republican, look at how reluctant Obama has become to relinquish the ability to also claim 'state secrets' to stop court cases cold, his failure to completely restore the right of
habeas corpus to our people, whom has taken advantage of republican malfeasance in office to secure tax payer dollars to shore up shipwrecked corporations that used the republican mantra of 'trickle down economics' and 'fewer regulations and regulatory agencies' to bend the Statute of Liberty right over and stick the high hard one to her without benefit of regulatory condoms to prevent the unwanted pregnancy which they will insist not be aborted even if Lady Liberty will otherwise die.
Why do Americans pretend to be gods on earth? We have bigger, more destructive power (to include nuclear weapons) than any country on earth – for now. Given our dire financial straits other countries are able to continue weapons development unabated and unswayed by the paper tiger threats of a bankrupt, both monetarily and morally, America. While Kim Jong Il provides comic relief and the magicians aids trained to distract your attention you can bet China continues steadily with their stealth submarine programs, negating their need to build long range missiles. Why bother when you can park hundreds of undetectable subs loaded for nuclear bear right off our shorelines. And in case you think that impossible, read
this:
Two years ago, a Chinese sub shocked the U.S. Navy by surfacing within torpedo range of the USS Kitty Hawk aircraft carrier near the Japanese island of Okinawa. Beijing claimed the sub was in international waters and was not "stalking" the carrier, which was taking part in a naval exercise.
All of these things tend to point towards the end of democracy as a legitimate form of government, with the American government working just as hard, if not harder, than foreign countries seeking that goal. This is already NOT the America that I, or anyone else over 50, grew up in. It is unrecognizable as the beacon of hope and freedom it used to represent.
America, American government, democracy, and the freedoms and rights we formerly enjoyed are in grave danger, as much so from the inside as from the other countries threatening us all.
But these are only some of the thing about which I ruminate, there are many more, but hey, my mind shuts down twice a day so I could be wrong.
I just know that you don't look at bear footprints and say, "Oh! Look! Kitty went this way!"
Labels: bailouts, betrayal, China, civil liberties, civil rights, disinformation, FBI, GOP, liars, republican hypocrisy, republican lies
The headline reads, "Regulate Me, Please."
posted by Bill Arnett @ 1:38 PM Permalink
… and I really like the comments made in this op-ed by Tom Wilson of Allstate Insurance from
the NYT:THERE are plenty of people singling out causes for the collapse of the financial markets, and conveniently, the source of the problem is usually someone else. But accountability lies with all of us — the insurance industry, regulators, banks and credit rating agencies. The insurance companies that wrote credit default swaps were happy not to be regulated. Insurance regulators didn’t expand their oversight to ensure the solvency of these companies. Banking regulators, banks and credit rating agencies did not properly assess the strength of issuers and readily accepted these complex derivatives.…
Business and government leaders must avoid the trap of diminished expectations and continue to demand the best of ourselves and our fellow Americans. Millions of hard-working families are counting on us to get this right.
How 'bout that? An insurance executive speaking up for American families and people.
Perhaps miracles CAN happen once in a while.
Labels: bad laws, bad politicians, bailouts, Banking, economics, Economy
Some folks are starting to figure it out
posted by The Vidiot @ 7:16 PM Permalink
Though, it's not quite in the way that I would like. It seems
a recent poll shows that fewer people than before are thinking that capitalism is OK.
Bad news for those fearful of "creeping socialism" in the United States -- only 53 percent of Americans now believe capitalism is the better system, according to a new poll Thursday.
Fully 20 percent in the Rasmussen Reports survey said that socialism was their preferred economic system -- a startling number that suggests growing disaffection as the "land of the free" fights its worst recession in decades.
While I like that less people are approving of capitalism, the fact that they prefer socialism is a problem, mostly because most don't know what socialism really is. I don't have a problem with real socialism. It's just that actual socialism -- where the workers control the means of production as well as decide on the distribution of the benefits of that production -- has never happened except for a few factories in Argentina that have been taken over by the workers and a few communes here and there. But socialism, as most understand it, is little more than democratic or reformed socialism which is basically state-subsidized capitalism. It's kind of like capitalism with public health care.
Right now, governments are taking over banks and businesses and by doing so, theoretically, the people are now co-owners and are supposed to garner some benefits from that ownership... but that’s not what’s happening, is it? The people don’t have any say and they have no power. Additionally, the people are paying for it, but the corporations are the only ones that are benefiting. So, therefore, it is NOT socialism. (It’s more like fascism actually.) What it should be called is “state-subsidized capitalism” because it is neither full-blown traditional capitalism where the corporations stand on their own legs with the State merely facilitating for them in their quest for profits and nor is it post-capitalism because we’d have an economy that is entirely different.
No, the government is now maintaining the corporations, not in the interest of the people, but in the interest of capitalism because capitalism is failing. It is a logical progression of our economic system that has been foreseen by many an economic theorist. Capitalism is in its death throws and the people who are embedded in it are putting it on life support and are terrified of pulling the plug. What the government is doing with AIG and all of the banks is not socialism as I understand it, and it’s certainly not socialism in the way that the right or the left mean it and it’s definitely not socialism in the way the media, both left-leaning and right-leaning, are using it.
It is really state-subsidized capitalism. Perhaps even neo capitalism with state subsidization, if you want to get fancy about it. But it is definitely not socialism.
So the next time someone starts saying "socialism" this or "socialism" that, you have my permission to correct them.
Labels: bailouts, capitalism, socialism
Why aren't there riots here?
posted by The Vidiot @ 7:20 AM Permalink
It's beginning to look like the "terror"
manufactured by the banking industry might've been more like the manufactured terror leading up to the Iraq war.
Key members of Congress were stunned to hear Federal Reserve Board Chairman Ben Bernanke and Treasury Secretary Hank Paulson say on Sept. 18 in a closed-door meeting on Capitol Hill that the country was “days away” from a complete financial meltdown—one that could lead to Depression-like runs on banks, widespread violence and ultimately even to a possible declaration of martial law. It was a vision of Armageddon, but, of course, 10 days later, the House rejected a Wall Street bailout package sent over by Paulson, only to pass one in a more limited form—the Emergency Economic Stabilization Act—a week later that gave Paulson less power and only half the money he wanted.
Meanwhile, the financial system did not collapse and while a few banks were failing, there were no runs on them, and martial law wasn’t invoked. One reason things didn’t fall apart when Congress didn’t immediately act as Paulson and Bernanke demanded, may be that there wasn’t any danger of a meltdown in the first place. So say three senior economists working at the Federal Reserve Bank of Minneapolis, who in October examined the Fed’s own data, and concluded in an article titled Facts and Myths About the Financial Crisis of 2008 that the claims that interbank lending and commercial lending had seized up were simply not true.
Could it be? Would they lie to us? Really?
Really.
Not only that, as you've no doubt heard, they've continued to give themselves
hefty bonuses, ostensibly to keep their good employees right where they are, rather than have them leave their jobs for say, some other bank that pays even more. The fact though is that every single one of those folks who got bonuses to keep them happy are really keeping their heads down and are praying they don't get laid off or fired. There's no worry of them going elsewhere because, frankly, there's no elsewhere to go. Not only that, they have to know that their employers might be looking to fill their jobs with
foreign workers to save money.
The dozen banks now receiving the biggest rescue packages, totaling more than $150 billion, requested visas for more than 21,800 foreign workers over the past six years for positions that included senior vice presidents, corporate lawyers, junior investment analysts and human resources specialists. The average annual salary for those jobs was $90,721, nearly twice the median income for all American households.
So, bottom line, Paulson
et al bamboozled the US Taxpayer, while the banks siphoned off that money to line their own pockets and to continued to do business as usual with no repercussions.
Ain't that grand? Aren't you angry yet?
Update: I'm
not the only one wondering why there aren't any riots in the US.
Outside of a few scattered and quickly contained protests, the citizens of the U.S. -- a country born of revolution, but with an elite that's been terrified of that legacy since immediately after its founding -- have been calm, despite opinion polls showing that Americans are more dissatisfied with the direction in which the country has been headed since they began measuring such things.
It's a baffling disconnect, considering that real wages for all but the top 10 percent of the economic pile haven't increased in 35 years.
Labels: bailouts, Banking, capitalism
Mr. Kotter! Mr. Kotter! I have a question.
posted by The Vidiot @ 3:44 PM Permalink
Why aren't
these guys bailing out the car companies?
Exxon Mobil Corp. on Friday reported a profit of $45.2 billion for 2008, breaking its own record for a U.S. company, even as its fourth-quarter earnings fell 33 percent from a year ago.
I mean, their PROFIT is almost double what the car companies asked for, no? And wouldn't it be in their best interest to make sure cars are produced so their oil is used?
I'm not rocket scientist, but that seems to make sense to me.
Labels: automakers, bailouts, corporate greed
I don't get it
posted by The Vidiot @ 7:41 AM Permalink
Why did we just give Ford a ton of money? I thought it was to
save 'merican jobs.
Ford Motor Company started producing its fuel-efficient low-cost Fiesta car at a plant in the eastern Chinese city of Nanjing on Thursday, the company said.
...
The Fiesta will go on sale in North America in early 2010 and will be produced at Ford's Cuautitlan Assembly Plant in Mexico.
Labels: bailouts, corporate greed, Economy
Working hard or hardly working?
posted by The Sailor @ 11:53 AM Permalink
After Rescue, Bonuses Still Flow At AIG
Insurance giant AIG was given $152 billion in bailout money by the federal government since nearly collapsing in September. Now the company is planning to take millions of that money and hand it over to employees in a program that sounds a lot like bonuses.
AIG's new CEO is only taking a single dollar for his compensation this year and the top 60 executives won't be getting bonuses. But that hasn't stopped AIG from finding a creative way to keep some of their top employees in what they're calling "retention payments,"
Umm, when even lawyers and bankers are filing for unemployment, why do these executives need a 'bonus' to keep working? One would think just keeping the paycheck would be enough incentive.
In related news: The rethuglicans in the Senate trashed the auto bailout when Dems wouldn't give in to their demand that people making $28 per hour take a pay cut. When was the last time congress voted themselves a pay cut? [hint: NEVER!]
I did good work and good works this year and I make less than 10% of their salaries and less than 1% of Wall Street execs. I'm not getting a bonus this year and I'm not getting a raise this year and I didn't get $152 BILLION to bail out a predictably failed business model ... but I count myself lucky I still have a job.
Now excuse me while I comfort myself with bread and circuses (AKA the NFL.)
Cross posted at SteveAudioLabels: bailouts, republicans
Wow.
posted by The Vidiot @ 7:44 AM Permalink
The lame-duck republicans managed to
block the auto industry bailout. I did not think that would happen. I assumed that some sort of lame-assed compromise would be reached and everyone would be disappointed... just like always.
I had mixed feelings about the bailout. On one hand, I figured, let the f-ckers fail. They f-cked up. They made really bad decisions. They did a piss-poor job of keeping up with the technology. They're dinosaurs. They should be extinct. On the other hand though, there's all the people -- the employees, the suppliers, and the distributers -- that will lose their jobs.
What happens now? Well, short term, the market will probably tank today. I don't think that even the plunge protection team will be able to save today. Long term, who knows. A LOT of folks will be out of a job. If I had any advice to give, it would be for those workers to pull together, democratically come up with a newer and better business plan than those lame-assed corpororate monkeys, take over the factories and do it themselves. Kind of like
they're doing in Argentina. That's the only way I see out of this mess; having the workers own the means of production.
May you live in interesting times...
Labels: automakers, bailouts, Economy
The Automotive Kings are Dead - Long Live the Kings!
posted by Bill Arnett @ 12:57 PM Permalink
Well, while Senator Richard Shelby (R-Industrial Killer), waxes pontifical and lectures the country on the irredeemability of the American Automakers it should be remembered that he represents a state with three foreign car manufacturers, Hyundai, Honda and Mercedes-Benz, who no doubt will look favorably upon the Senator for the obstructionist position against a Big 3 American car bailout, and who are no doubt rejoicing and cracking open the champaign bottles to celebrate today. After all, how many times can you have an American Senator suckling the teat of Big Foreign Business as if his lips were superglued to that teat?
"Chapter 11, Chapter 11!" seems to be the only alternative offered by persons with vested interest in the failure of American businesses, the GOP. The GOP will do nothing that would even lend itself to the possibility of rescuing an American company
while Democrats are in charge.
Just as the last year has proven, the GOP has a sufficient number of obstructionists to stop any progressive legislation in an attempt to make the Democratic Party look weak and ineffectual. And they are willing to cut off their noses to spite their faces, for I believe in the truth of Paul Krugman's assertion that people are not going to buy cars from a bankrupt manufacturer or one entering bankruptcy.
What incentive is there to buy a new car from a company that may no longer exist next year? Especially when a guy's senators and congressmen can get monstrous donations to their reelection campaigns for essentially sitting by and doing nothing other than speaking out against any bailout from our carmakers.
Granted, our Big 3 dug their own graves with gas guzzling SUV (no doubt built at the behest of Big Oil - you scratch my back and?) and their steadfast refusal to build the cars of the future, hybrids, electrical and hydrogen, for which they no doubt have many possible vehicles already on the drawing board. But why bother when Big Oil, which owns more politicians than anyone (Look at the Iraqi Oil Wars) can count on government bowing to it's control until it's too late to take any action, so once again it will be the foreign car companies that will lead the way on new innovations, both because the Americans won't, and because they will (and do) realize there is no long term success to be had building cars that continue to use oil.
But in the meantime Big Oil and foreign manufacturers will continue to make ever greater profits until a profitable business model can be had that will minimize those entities that will, as all cornered beast will do, fight tooth-and-nail for their survival.
Regardless of the costs of buying all those politicians.
Just think how much Hyundai, Honda and Mercedes-Benz will be able to jack up their prices to purchase and, more importantly, the exorbitant new charges for servicing those cars. And as the inventory of American cars and parts to service them the prices can only go up, for there will be ever more politicians awaiting their handout to continue their obstructionist ways.
Ah, what a wonderful time to be a member of the millionaire's club, the U.S. Senate where, by god, when you buy a politician that S.O.B. stays bought and can produce more lickspittle than is comfortable to contemplate.
NOTE: And let's not forget this golden opportunity for a handful of politicians to go against the better interests of the country and view this as a "union-busting" opportunity, despite the fact that it was the unions, after WWII, that set this country on course for its most profitable decades in American, and probably, human history and the spreading of wealth from the bottom going up and not the thoroughly discredited "trickle down theory" of republican economics that has bankrupted America and is close to completely destroying our financial health - or what's left of it.
Labels: bailouts, big oil, bush hypocrisy, Congress, Conservatives, conspiracy, corptocracy, corruption, disinformation, propaganda
Why do so many of the arrogant few feel so deserving…
posted by Bill Arnett @ 2:35 PM Permalink
…of massive bonuses after literally having ridden their companies into the ground and leaving them hanging on the precipice of bankruptcy?
Quoting an article from the
Huffington Post:
From the Wall Street Journal:
Merrill Lynch & Co. chief John Thain has suggested to directors that he get a 2008 bonus of as much as $10 million, but the battered securities firm's compensation committee is resisting his request, according to people familiar with the situation.
The committee and full board are scheduled to meet Monday to hear Mr. Thain's formal bonus recommendations for himself and other senior executives of the New York company. No decision has been reached, and it isn't known what Mr. Thain will recommend, but the compensation committee is leaning toward denying the executives bonuses for this year, these people said.
Reuters points out that several other Wall Street firms, including Goldman Sachs, will not be giving out bonuses to top executives this year. Though Thain's company was sold to Bank of America after losing a net $11.67 billion this year, Thain argued that it could have been worse.
Thain has said he deserves a bonus because he helped avert what could have been a much larger crisis at the firm, people familiar with his thinking told the WSJ.
Members of Merrill's compensation committee agree with Thain that the takeover is in shareholders' best interest, but believe it would be foolish to ignore strong public sentiment against large compensation packages, the paper said, citing people familiar with their thinking.
Is this finally the blowback from our efforts to build self esteem in all our children by labeling the losers "winners", also? How can this loser realistically, laughably, ridiculously, and idiotically assert that after aiding, while in a position of trust and with the expectation of competency, and participating in the dramatic failures of his company he wants MORE than the ten million dollar bonus to which he certainly believes he is entitled?
What's he gonna do? Threaten to quit and take all that knowledge and skill with him to another company, the bankruptcy of which he could once again contribute to and expect a pat on the head, and millions in bonuses "…because he tries so hard and we mustn't discourage him by pointing out his failures, much less holding him accountable for them by affecting his exorbitant salary and bonuses - we mustn't run the risk of damaging his self-esteem, which he possesses in spades…"
America - where it's all about who you know and no longer a country that recognizes success and failures. If you know the right people, hell, it doesn't matter if you succeed or fail - those in power will see that you are rewarded with Midas-like bonuses either way, so if you want to totally screw up, screw your company and then thoroughly f*ck the poor workers and taxpayers and consumers you were supposed to serve, America is now the place for you.
You'll feel s-o-o-o much better.
Labels: bailouts, Banking, corporate greed, corporate owned media, corruption, disinformation, economic disparity, Economy, propaganda
"Say, buddy, can ya spare me an extra billion dollars or so?…
posted by Bill Arnett @ 7:16 AM Permalink
…was the question I asked a rather impatient young snot (sorry, I didn't mean to accidently impugn anyone's character, that was deliberate.) on the other end of the phone at the Treasury as I was trying my damnedest to get me some of those federal bailout dollars, seein' as how I'm as close to being underwater as all them there billionaires they're givin' our tax dollars to.
"Well," he asked, "how many and of what nature were the securities you purchased through the bank you own to back the bad loans you made?"
"First of all," I said,"I don't own a bank and I haven't made any bad loans to anyone since I lent that forty dollars to my cousin so he could buy a pot-belly pig. Not a pig with pot in his belly, as we soon found out afterwards to the great discomfort of the pig."
Mr. Snooty then said, "We're not running a charitable organization here, so unless you've squandered several billion dollars on known bad investments I'm afraid I just can't help you."
"Well, except for those fellas running the au-to-mo-bile factories y'all seem exactly like a charity, ceptin' the onliest ones you be givin' that charity to are big-time banker fellas like Mr. Monopoly, who owns all those railroads and thangs," said I.
"Mr. Who?" asked Mr. Snooty, seemingly genuinely confused.
"You know," I told him,"the guy with the fancy tailcoat, round-rimmed glasses, big-@assed mustache, owns all the banks and thangs?"
"Did you aid him in making billions of dollars of loans for bad real estate and those railroads you referred to?"
"Well," I said, "I've gone broke many a time landing on Park Place with four hotels on it, other than that I seem to have done alright. I pay my bills, feed my family, ain't much but I've got some small savings, and I live frugally. But I did lose all the money in the bank to my sisters and my other cousin who were all playin', too, even though I think they was cheatin' like they was playin' with play money."
"So let me get this straight, you ARE a banker who has squandered all his money making bad real estate deals and otherwise mismanaging your bank?"
"I guess you could say that, if ya wanna put it that way."
His demeanor changed right quick, "Well, why didn't you say so immediately? Listen, give me your address and I'll send you a temporary bailout check for $300,000,000 followed up by some REAL money next week. May I have your address? And one last question, sir, you ARE applying for this bailout even though you're not broke, correct?"
I assured him that was the case, since I had a coupla railroads left after the last game (I think it was the Reading and the R&R lines), so I gave him my address and will be steadily waitin' for my check. With a worm on my tongue. (bated breath-h/t Robin Williams)
Labels: bailouts, banks, humor
Anyone care to make a wager?…
posted by Bill Arnett @ 10:52 AM Permalink
…that the states that apply for federal relief money will be told to go screw themselves?
After all, this is the Bush Billionaire Bailout Bill for Wall Street, so I am certain that states like California (Govahnor Ahnold) and Massachusetts will be told, sadly of course, that this a FEDERAL bailout of Wall Street and if the individual states are going broke they shouldn't have so recklessly squandered their state taxpayer's money.
I mean, these states aren't even wartime profiteers! The nerve of their chief executives! Wanting part of the 700 billion dollars, partially being paid for by every taxpayer in their very own states.
Shocking, shocking I tell you that members of the United Socialist States of America expect help from the Socialist Czar bush und his Field Marshall General for Bankers Henry Paulson.
Now, if the states are willing to cede complete control of their state, to include all their resources, industries, and people to the Socialist Czar bush, that MIGHT be worth considering.
Any takers?
Labels: bailouts, banks, bush hypocrisy, Economy, fear mongering, Paulson, republican party, requiem
Headline: Citigroup Says Judge Suspends Wachovia Deal…
posted by Bill Arnett @ 1:04 PM Permalink
…from the
NYT.
So it begins.
Like dogs fighting over the last scrap of food we can sit back and watch Big Banks savage each over the scraps of our broken Socialist Financial Sector. Wasn't Wachovia supposed to be one of the last banks standing just a few weeks ago? I wonder how much of th' pot o' gold Leprechaun Paulson will give these banks to relieve them of responsibility for their own debts so they won't be unduly encumbered?
After all, when billionaires run their businesses into the mud who can they turn to except we taxpayers who pay and pay and pay with very little asked for or provided by our dysfunctional government.
I wonder if I call and say I'm a broke billionaire if Paulson will send me a check in a great enough sum to buy a new Maserati?
Labels: bailouts, Economy, Fiscal irresponsibility, hypocrisy
Wow.
posted by The Vidiot @ 10:48 AM Permalink
Just,
wow.
"But if you look at what the Fed has already done, and the extension of power to Treasury to deal with Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac, I believe we're talking about a trillion dollars," he said.
I mean, I don't even know what a trillion dollars is. It might as well be a bazagillion dollars.
Labels: bailouts, Economy
Again, said without a hint of irony.
posted by The Vidiot @ 9:36 AM Permalink
There's a
big bailout in the works for Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac that could be on the President's desk as early as next week. A deal has been struck.
The added provision, proposed by Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson Jr., would give Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac access to government capital in the form of loans or equity purchases.
So, basically, the government is going to hand over money to the two entities, so that all of the owners of those restructured assets won't loose all of their money. This deal doesn't really help the homeowner who is facing foreclosure though. In fact, I suspect that if there's money for a bailout, the banks will foreclose on even more houses, knowing full well that there will be money for them from the government to cover their losses.
Though, here's the ironic part.
While the White House favors much of the bill, it has threatened to veto it over a provision that calls for almost $4 billion in grants to states and communities for buying and repairing foreclosed homes in distressed neighborhoods.
The White House opposes the measure because it says it helps lenders and not homeowners. Democrats backing the grants dispute this, saying that foreclosed homes drag down property values for surrounding homeowners.
The ENTIRE bill helps lenders and not homeowners. That $4 billion provision actually MIGHT help homeowners, so that's why the administration opposes it.
But this guy has a theory or two on the bailouts:
The crux of the matter is that the Illuminists know that if they cannot convince the US public to bail out these various bonds and derivatives and their various owners and counter-parties, the system will collapse and all those trillions in treasuries hanging around in the forex reserves of these nations will come back to roost with a vengeance as foreigners stampede to unload their treasuries and their remaining toxic waste in exchange for commodities and other tangible assets before they become worthless and/or to force the Illuminists to lobby for a public bailout of the tanking asset-backed bonds and derivatives under threat of a treasury boycott or hyperinflation-inducing treasury flood back to the US. That is their greatest fear, because such an event would destroy them and their precious system, especially the bond market, which is the main source of their power, a fact which we cannot overemphasize. They are trying to manage the dollar down gradually by use of a beggar-thy-neighbor policy, and the failure to win these public bailouts would collapse the system and take them all down with it before they have a chance to bail out of stocks, bonds and other paper assets through the dark pools of liquidity known as Project Turquoise and Baikal and into commodities and other tangible assets.
Where are those aliens when you need them?
Labels: bailouts, banks, Economy
